8/10 Good
Christopher
Nov 19, 2025
Well well well, the De Vere. A hotel so scenic it felt like I was walking through Middle-Earth on the hunt for a flat white. Rolling hills, whispering trees, and my cocker spaniel leading the charge like Aragorn with a tennis ball. Genuinely stunning — the kind of place you could propose marriage, bury a body, or both depending on how brunch goes.
The grounds were biblical. If you told me God himself had done the landscaping I’d believe you. My dog was in his element, sniffing every leaf like it had been scented with royal jelly. I half expected woodland creatures to burst into song and form a choir around us. It was like taking the hobbits to Isengard, except the hobbits were middle-class dog owners and the only thing getting destroyed was a ham and cheese panini.
The hotel itself? Cracking. Comfy beds, nice bar, the odd whiff of faded grandeur. Like a posh aunt who drinks before noon and once had a fling with a minor royal.
But let’s get into the meat and bones, shall we? Sunday afternoon at the bar — enter stage left: Miserable Man in the Blazer. This guy took our drinks order with all the enthusiasm of a slug with a hangover. Grunted at us like a warthog sniffing for apples under a log, barely made eye contact, and shuffled off like he was being forced at gunpoint to serve the general public. He looked managerial too, the sort of bloke who probably has “People Skills” on his LinkedIn, but in reality has all the charisma of a burnt crumpet.
Christopher
Stayed 2 nights in Nov 2025
